#Im not even that far into the show and i KNOW it gets worse
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i keep feeling the need to apologize for being so negative all the time, the truth is i am not satisfyed at all with anything i draw or write anymore, it feels bland and uninteresting like its lost anything that used to make it not so, i dont know how to change that, and the few people telling me otherwise are likely tired of it (i do not blame anyone even for a second)
'draw for yourself' really doesnt work for me, i cant not draw, despite trying that too, bc then theres nothing left to do, but i mainly draw bc i need to connect with people, show people stuff and see if they like it, see if i can bring something new to the table, it makes me feel less alone and like theres actual merit to what i do, like all these brainworms arent worthless, i havent actually lost my mind, .. not healthy but its how i have been hanging on for the last few years of my life
and i see im slowly losing everything on all ends, the stuff i post used to be what kept me afloat mentally while life is shit, but its all going downhill, and it has been for a while, im not blaming others for it, i know the problem is on my end, i just dont know how to solve it, its on me to make something interesting that compells people, not that they own anything to me, obviously, but i feel i lost everything that used to make things interesting, my brainworms have gotten old and boring, the slow speed and amateurish way i present stuff likely contributing to it to no small part
i hate disappointing or letting others down, i constantly feel like i am not delivering anything worthwhile, making promises i cant uphold to compensate, setting higher standards and expectations to myself to compensate, i need to be better, somehow, at some point i have to get better at it- theres also the guilt i feel for not being able to do anything for the people that keep being nice regardless, i need to do extra good for them! i have to make it up to them! make it worthwhile for them at least bc if anyone deserves it it is them!
its a self perpetuating downwards spiral, ironically enough, i know talking negatively all the time is annoying and is only making it all even worse, its alienating even more people, understandibly so, but my eternal problem is not being able to shut up, i cant pretend to be happy, sure, but i cant even shut up about it, so here i am being annoying about it once again
im running out of time on all ends of my life happy 28 birthday to me, how did i even make it this far
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Klance-coded Pierce the Veil songs !!
— i only did 7 songs but i might make a big post with a few songs from each album that make me think of klance (also please be nice to me, this makes more sense in my head and im bad at describing stuff!!!!!)
Caraphernila
“and baby honestly it’s harder breathing next to you”
i think of it as keith and lance’s envy towards each other. they both feel overshadowed by the other without knowing how much they are admired by them
“hold my heart, it’s beating for you anyway”
holding his heart is letting him feel all of his love and emotions, even if it gets crushed. i think this is how keith and lance’s relationship works. lance is literally one of the only people that makes keith feel seen, being able to understand his emotions with barely any words (i think about the scene where everyone just looks over at lance and waits for him to go comfort keith. and lance does so, not even knowing that everyone was expecting him to do it)
“So what if I can't forget you? I'll burn your name into my throat, I'll be the fire that'll catch you”
i think about this as post canon klance. they have left such a big impact on each other’s lives, and then they just go their separate ways??? like no keith is definitely still thinking about lance who’s down on earth. he doesn’t want to forget him and probably never will
Million Dollar Houses (The Painter)
“would you ever try to leave me for somebody who deserves you most”
i think keith would still have some sort of lingering fear that he isn’t enough for lance, despite not actually dating him. so lance “leaving” him for allura in season 8. this can also play on lance’s insecurities, especially when in comparison to keith
“but, baby no, sometimes things don’t work out the way we planned”
OKAY THIS ONE IS DUMB and like kinda generic but it makes me think of how they were doomed by the writers LMAO
“maybe we’re meant to lose the ones we love but i’ll fight for you till then”
both keith and lance have lost a lot during the series’s events but they keep pushing further (especially with the help of each other)
Flawless Execution
“i’ll scar you with my flawless execution every time”
i think about this a lot with black paladin keith + red paladin lance. they are both learning to step up, wanting to prove themselves worthy of their positions.
“i’m not obsessed, far worse, i’m fine” “i didn’t mean to burden you with love in my condition”
this describes someone who’s love is so intense that it’s overwhelming. this is very klance to me because of how deeply connected they are to each other without even knowing it. keith being the person who gives lance the reassurance he needs, and lance being the person who is able to either push keith to do something or pull him back to rationalize his thoughts. THEY CANT LOVE LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE because they are stupid and i hate them
“you and i are blood and wine”
shows how different they are. they’re complete opposites but still somehow complete each other
First Punch
“i’ve got so much to give, but i would kill just to feel less invisible. and you got so much to learn about gravity, so live it up baby don’t look down”
this one is more about lance and his insecurities of being a paladin. although he desperately wanted to use the black lion, (s3 in the ep where they were seeing who the black lion would respond to, lance really hoped it would be him, even sitting in the lion longer than the other paladins did, just hoping it would work) he supported keith and pushed him into stepping into his new role.
the rest of the song is a lot more aggressive and i don’t think it fits keith and lance’s feelings towards each other. like even early season klance doesn’t have the same hatred as in the song but the bridge will always be lance to me
Dive In
“now i wanna be the tattoo ink that swims down through the needle in your skin”
PEAK ROMANCE‼️ i don’t have a lot of reason for this one but being tattoo ink in someone’s skin is like being with someone forever. it makes me think of the permanent scarring there were left with by the end of the series (keith’s face scar after returning to voltron and lance’s altean marks in the finale)
I Don’t Care If You’re Contagious
“And I don't care if you're sick. I don't care if you're contagious. I would kiss you even if you were dead”
this is not really based on any canon content. keith and lance are so deeply intertwined with each other without even knowing it. platonic or romantic, they care about each other. and i have very much think this insane devotion in this song feels like klance core
“I'm gonna tear out the thread one by one from your skin. Till your bones feel embarrassed from all the attention. Kiss me while I drive”
PEAK ROMANCE‼️‼️ this song just generally makes me think of ships i like because this song is full of love and devotion i love it
Even When I’m Not With You
“Even when I'm not with you, I'm still with you”
this always makes me think of when keith and lance get separated. especially when keith leaves voltron, he’s still with lance (especially bc i like to think about keith leaving lance with his red lion, giving lance a little piece of him). this can so be post-canon klance because i know they are still thinking about each other even though they’re off doing their own things
“Even when I think I hate you, I still love you”
even despite any fighting, bickering, and disputes, keith and lance always care about each other, wanting them to be able to work together as a team. especially with black paladin keith!!! lance is always trying to make things work because he’s passionate about voltron’s success (and by further extension, wanting keith to be a good leader)
“Look how far we've come. Think I've finally won”
vic fuentes “think i’ve finally won” is in reference to being able to settle down with his wife. and so like i think about this as klance. by the end of the series, they both got their ending (i don’t like lance’s ending i fear) but they actually are “winning” when they are together
notes: IM SORRY A LOT OF THESE ARE POORLY EXPLAINED :(( but i heart klance and ptv so much
my secret useless talent is that i can make any pierce the veil song be about klance
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it’s really sad that i always looked forward to rhaenyra and/or alicent scenes last season but i now feel the urge to fast forward every time one of them comes on screen
- every alicent scene is her looking sad or crying or her with cole but nothing she does adds anything of value to the plot
- we get the same black council scene in which the men are undermining rhaenyra twice per episode and still nothing is done (i do believe she will make some progress in the next episodes but it’s just so boring to watch her have the same scene over and over again)
cersei and dany i miss you both so much
#and there are other characters in the show that are so much more interesting but but don’t get the screen time they deserve#and i know that they’re women and they have to face these struggles for it to be realistic but they did that last season too and they found#a way for it to not be repetitive#but rhaenyra just being so soft and always looking for peace is just so frustrating especially after how season 2 ended up#and obviously she’s the rightful heir and the better option for the iron throne but oh my god they have made her character so uninteresting#to watch#and i really liked rhaenyra in s1 and i thought she had a lot of potential as a character#in a show where the majority of the characters are supposed to be morally grey (even if done clumsily) she doesn’t stand out#and what has become of alicent is worse because she’s not even doing anything anymore but she’s still being forced into the story#with random plot lines#i wish they would just let the characters be and give them as much screen time as they need#and i don’t want to watch a show about good team vs bad team i wish they have given rhaenyra more complexity#because even though aegon sucks and they made him the worse thing a person can be and unredeemable#i am unfortunately not bored whenever he is onscreen#and i think so far they have established that the targaryens suck so many times even if they do good things every once in a while#aegon sucks viserys sucks aemond sucks dany sucks daemon sucks#all of them to different extents and in different ways ofc#but let my girl rhaenyra suck a little too because she deserves it 😫#she lost her father her son her daughter her throne let her be a little more like she was in the book#she was not a saint and her character deserves to not be reduced to being a good peaceful queen#hotd negativity#anti hotd#i must also say that i am a casual fan im not here to make analysis of the characters or discuss whether plot lines from the book should#have been changed#im not watching the show critically and this is just something i have noticed and has bothered me every time a new episode drops
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Controversial take but i watched all of jjk, in subbed, so it had my full attention 100% of the time, and i am of the opinion that it just fucking sucks.
So me and my wife were talking about it, and we were trying to figure out why people like it and we've come up short. I do not understand what's so appealing about this show for so many people. Can someone PLEASE tell me.
#yes the animation is phenominal and honestly i would have stopped watching after the first episode without it#MAPPA creates some beautiful art like just gorgeous#but the constant force-feeding of every minor character's backstory was hellish for me#had me rolling my eyes every time they did it (every three seconds)#the vast majority of characters are unlikable or bland or dead#often all of the above#choso is the only character i actively liked?? like i understand him i reallu do#i liked mahito? he's a freak so that's a given#i liked that one old guy with the weird still frames power#uhhh i like sukuna's weird obsession with ripoff sasuke#edit i member: i liked megumi he deserved better#oh i also REALLY liked nanamin or whatever his name was (it's been a while)#i think yuuji's suicide mission that he didn't think through is super interesting#alright heres my most controversial take of all#i don't care at ALL abt gojo. he's so mid there's like a million characters exactly like him#and he's UGLY why do people say he's attractive bro is UGLY A HELL#the intros are baller tho i sat through them every episode no skipping that shit#gorgeous animation as i'd expect from this studio#like! there's so many little drops of things that i liked about this show! which is why it pissed me off so much every time they did boring#ass exposition dumps on characters that are gonna die in five seconds. or worse-they are gonna live and continue to bore me to tears#and when i tell you i physically couldn't read the manga because of how fucking BORING it is#i got caught up and was like 'okay ill read the manga i kinda like what's currently happening n ive made it this far might as well keep goi#g' nah man i couldn't even read a whole chapter. jjk is king of exposition dumps#i do think the powers and how if you tell your opponent what it is it gets stronger is rad#and it drives me insane because i know they know how to drip-feed information about a character! and when they do that they do it SO WELL!!#but they just force feed you all this information the rest of the time like BRO ITS TOO MUCH SLOW DOWN AND JUST LET THE CHARACTERS DO THEIR#THING AND IT WILL BE MORE SATISFYING#anyways not tagging this because i don't wanna put hate in the main tags#just like. if you see this please explain to me what im missing PLEASE i want to like this show SO bad
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i love reading things set in countries that i'm knowledgeable and/or have been to because i can point out really minor errors in fanfiction. i think the average american does not know that in england (and apparently some of asia! which i only just found out) there are switches on power outlets so you can just turn it off instead of unplugging it. like 9 times out of 10 that won't come up but on the off chance it does i'm like ohoho. this clown has never been to england...! my favorite part though is watching americans (specifically americans because i swear to god people who speak english as a second language and/or are from any other country have some idea of what it's like to have an accent / personally know people who have accents? idk) try to write british accents like it is REALLY funny. i literally only lived their for five years and i never picked up a full accent myself (certain words and tones i did but they're mostly gone after living in the states again for a few years) but between living there and having a ridiculous amount of family there & visiting them often (like once a year if im lucky) i like KNOW what british accents sound like. i think some americans genuinely dont even know theres more than one or two english accents i think some people think there's like posh english and chav english and nothing else. maybe scottish accent gets thrown in there if they remember the uk is not in fact just england. i would bet real money they've never heard a welsh accent. anyway my point is it's really funny watching people who don't know as much as i do write this stuff. like i see it and i understand how doctors read this and go Oh that is so medically inaccurate. i get them now. anyway i dont remember what my point here was but please know if you are attempting to write a british accent. reddit and youtube are your best friends if you don't have a british friend you can ask and also rest assured even if you do ONE google search. it will not be the worst attempt ive seen guaranteed
#muffin mumbles#idek what the definitive worst one ive seen is#but ive seen some baaaaad ones#favorite example though is in the fucking jjba dub.#like thats not even a fan / indie project thats a real professional thing people were paid to do?!?! and the accents. are fucking TERRIBLE#please im begging you. you dont need to hire famous american voice actors for this. just go to any pub in the whole of england#and i can guarantee youd get better results accent-wise.#speedwagon's accent is easily the worst in part 1 like if you want examples lemme know cause i have some. its so bad. its really bad#but also so so funny#joseph in part 2 is. MARGINALLY better than most of the part 1 cast#not good. far from it. but an improvement#anyway hearing speedwagon say anything especially in part 1 (hes calmer in part 2 and he sounds better (not good. better)#like hes better in part 2 but not by much and only sometjmes.)#hearing this painfully obvious attempt at an american doing a cockney(?) (cant even tell for sure) accent complete with misused slang.#is SO fucking funny#like i showed me mom and she said it was worse than dick van dyke in mary poppins and shes not even wrong#and the slang isnt even like. irs not even super uncommon slang and i dont think its used wrong technically (iirc) but it just sounds so#painfully unnatural. please i am begging them to just hire british people next time. i promise you there are british voice actors#that being said i am still incredibly sad they just gave everyone american accents from part 3 onwards because i miss the awful accents#i miss them dearly.#the main benefit to this imo is that now joseph joestar despite living in england for the first almost twenty years of his life#just got this full blown american accent after living in new york. like i know he did not pick that up naturally#i KNOW dude watched stupid fuckinf tv shows to practice his accent. i know he sounded like a cartoon mobster and suzie q was like jojo.#please for the love of god. you cannot start talking like this. go back to being british#alas he did not listen. but he did drop the mobster thing (sadly.)#anyway this is really unrelated but if joseph was not old as fuck when it started airing i think he wouldve gotten a kick outta seinfeld.#like if the years lined up that wouldve been his main show to practice his american accent to the point people are like hey you kinda sound#like jerry seinfeld. and hes like hah i wonder how that happened!#hes a massive fucking loser is what im saying. hes like my weirdo great uncle joseph joestar#anyway. got really off topic. thank you for watching remember to SMASH that like button
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whoever decided to write Saiki Kusuo owes me 400k for my therapy bills.
whoever decided to animate baby saiki as looking carefree and happy before his brother called him a monster owes me 100k for therapy bills.
#Hes so miserable it isn’t fair he deserves better#wbenever im reminded that having to having to hear everyone’s negative thoughts all the time is destroying his mental health#i weep#Or that he can’t sleep because he’s plauged with premonitions of future disasters disguised as nightmares that he then has to prevent#or that being protected by his grandpa shocked him so much that he changed his mind about him immediately#or that all he wants is quiet but when he actually gets that it doesn’t feel right either#Im not even that far into the show and i KNOW it gets worse#Is it like a rule for good comedies that the main character has to be the most miserable little guy ever#Jeff is all fucked up too and so is Eleanor
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i know im not alone on this but i also know this statement is like waving a stick at a hornets nest. my overall memories and nostalgia related to hetalia are generally not bad and i think it may have saved a depression-riddled middle school aged me from being lured towards way darker and more mentally damaging content or online groups
#im dead serious like before that i was getting into creepypasta which. look im not one to say horror would make my little developing brain#disintegrate or anything BUT as an online community and a subculture of sorts i think it was far more of a slippery slope into#toxicity and extremism and most of all romanticizing/normalizing things like self harm and unhealthy eating habits and so on#despite what a lot of people say on this site it’s really not an evil and fascism-endorsing show or anything#it just has occasional jokes or concepts that are a bit distasteful– though from what I can tell alot of the ones people point out are#improvised bullshit lines made up by english dub cast members#anyway I won’t get into that whole rant but point is i am so so serious it could’ve been so much worse#the worst thing that came of being into hetalia as a kid was being more prone to finding stereotype humor funny#which im still like. I feel like was much more distasteful in 2012-13 youtube content. like WAY more distasteful#and rampant in general. so even in a show that’s built on stereotypes like hetalia it’s TAMER than the stereotype humor of the time in#a ton of mainstream media. big youtubers were still doing casual blackface back then man. 99% of hetalia’s stereotype humor is like.#canadians are quiet and nice. japanese politeness is to an extreme. germans are efficient. americans are loud and like burger#sorry I said I wasn’t gonna go into this rant so. I digress. I was just thinking about this cause I realized seeing hetalia fanart#generally makes me feel a good- or at least not bad- kind of nostalgia. which seems adverse to the show’s reputation especially on this sit#food for thought or whatever#kibumblabs#oh yeah I know why I started thinking about this- a drawing of seychelles came up on my dash and i can’t help but feel warm seeing her pop#up because she was the first real full cosplay I ever did for a big con. (with help) i hand-made the dress and everything. :*)
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so evil that i can't find a single gifset of them in this episode at least not from searching the episode number like i usually do
#i hate you people#apparently people hate him which. okay it sounds like it gets Worse but#idk as far as the way trans people are being presented it feels Not That Bad#like yes we're doing trans 101 but also it's nice that he gets to have that idk :)#like idk the scene where everybody has cringe tumblr identities but at the same time hes like okay im gonna learn :)#and like hes presented as in the right. like yes that was for people to laugh at nonbinary kids#but also to say the right thing to do is be open to people when you dont Get Their Whole Deal#does that make sense? idk#like i also dont think this show has a Responsibility To Educate which is why it kind of feels weird that thats what theyre doing#especially when they only Kind Of know what theyre doing#it also feels awkward when they do it with ian re: mental health like since when does he Talk Like That#but overall i truly think its not that bad but i dont even want to care if its that bad bc it shouldnt be the point#anyway i think its very fun that everybody else is having real problems and ian gets to have a break for a while#and have his biggest problem be 'oh no we're both tops'#r.txt#shameless lb
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i know its 90% venting at the bleakness of american politics but like...
it really fucking blows to know that most people are probably not gonna vote this year. i cant wait for the fallout of that.
#rem rambles#last time trump was elected i was spit on and called a nigger to my face at work.#lets see what happens this time. surely not worse than that.#like fuck joe biden. i will personally beat him to death with a rock. i hated him last time. i hate him now.#but the swiftness that people are like 'no actually i'll take my chances with the republicans who have been flying nazi flags and actively#putting forth legislation to eradicate trans people and flirting with the klan and pushing for genital checks on kids' is...staggering.#like i see the strategy you think youre doing. as if democrats dont get off on losing constantly....#its not moral strength to sit down and let the worse motherfucker win just to say ''haha see! you need me! you should be nicer to me.''#if that was the case the democrats would have picked it up with hillary losing. but they didnt. obviously.#get local. start supporting local politicians that are more leftist than what we got. but by god to not expose people in red states#to even worse shit. do not encourage those bitches to visit my goddamn city AGAIN.#like what do you even think will happen outside of negative outcomes for people who arent you? like some republican will tell israel to sto#again i know its venting. so let me vent too. because holy shit is it wildly tone deaf to use the minorities that the republicans are#targeting as a fucking bargaining chip with people who dont care about us anyway.#as if saying ''im willing to sacrifice native americans to show democrats that i mean business'' will even work.#these people are so far gone that televised genocide will not move them. but you think digging your heels in will. absurd. childish behavio
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becoming an adult soon and feeling weird about it
#weird and a little disheartening to think about how much of my childhood has been spent putting up w being disabled#i know turning 18 isnt actually a huge deal and it doesnt really mean ive lost much but#idk just weird to see everyone else my age going out to the movies or going to parties#or whatever else#and i sit at home in pain most of the time or too tired from pain to do anything#cause going out usually means being bedridden for two days#idk im getting closer to an actual answer and treatment but it took so many years#and im angry that i didnt get to do kid/teen stuff while i was still at that age#i know im young and i have stuff to do in the future when all this starts to get better so im not like incredibly panicked#im just kind of bummed. sort of angry#ive just had a really shitty year and it gets worse when it gets better lately#i am and will be okay i just feel like shit#i watch my little shows and find other stuff to be happy about but it sucks to have missed out#anyway not to get hashtag emo on main about having a birthday soon i just need to yell about it somewhere a little bit i guess#and hi to my friends im ok and im getting better in some places even though im upset about other stuff#i miss u n i love u and i hope the year has been okay so far <3#anyway i dont think i have to say it but dont rb im just angry at being disabled etc
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ykw sometimes its better to just cancel the show
#s/he speaks#yes this is abt killing eve#(no i still havent gotten to the end it just keeps getting worse....... im here for the helene and villaneve scenes only atp)#and specifically the parallels between it and nbc hannibal#im gonna try to not go off too much bc i have enough thought to turn this into a 5 page essay#but basically#1. i feel like i dont even need to say this but if what happened to a show as popular as ke instead happened to a show a male oriented show#esp one with gay main characters. all of the writers would be in witness protection rn the backlash would have been deadly#2. besides the obvious point of misogyny and lesbophobia/hatred? discomfort? disinterest? with f/f relationships#it genuinely would have been better in the long term for ke to have ended on s3#i dont like s3 all that much but even w that being said it would have been 1000x better if it just. ended at the bridge scene#and now w the parallels to hannibal - a good chunk of what keeps hannibal alive even today (besides the great story characters etc etc)#is the fact that it was cancelled with an ambiguous ending. its the perfect recipe for endless fanfics and keeping the audience alive#by keeping them hoping that *maybe* someday there will be more to come no matter how unrealistic the expectation is#meanwhile w killing eve the fact that it is officially over there is no hope#our s4 *is there*. its there and its shit and we just have to live with it because there are no second chances#sure ppl can and do write fanfics abt alt endings and ppl still make edits n whatnot but it feels like the fandom is just dead/dying#bc any and all memory of even the best parts of the show gets tainted by the knowledge of how it ends and of how badly they fumbled it#and even worse when you KNOW it didnt have to be like that. it could have been good. and yet#idk. i said id keep this short but im still rambling i just have a lot of thoughts#i wanna post ke stuff but this is just killing any enthusiasm i had for the show so far#which is so fucking stupid bc i love it even with the shit last season and i cherish it sm its one of my all time favs im just devastated t#and esp as an excath and bi woman. s4 feels like a straight up personal attack on my own bs that i was forced to deal w#i wish women got better media i wish shows focused almost exclusively on women more i wish there were more morally grey/evil mc women#i wish representation of bi/les women existed outside of sanitized desexualized “pure bean” femxfem media#(tumblr deleted half my tags so rewriting) idk i just wish this type of show wasnt so fucking rare and that woman centred media wasnt so#“softened down” ig??? idk how to describe it but it just feels like theres no way to get any dark/gritty female media w/o it having like.#a shit ton of misogynistic violence sexualization and sa. esp when you add f/f pairings in it#like can we be fucking happy. for once. pls#rant over ig
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sorry for the person im gonna become when i know all of ultraman zeros lore
#im not immune to popular characters.#null havoc damage#i think its really funny that hes the only ultraman in the entire 55 year series that has a watch order#hes the only one with lore that spans multiple shows and movies. hes gods favorite. trapped in an eternal cosmic battle against satan#and he kind of sucks and his dad is even worse. hilarious i love him#ALL THE LORE I KNOW ABT ZERO MAKES FINDING NEW STUFF FUNNIER BUT IM NOT LETTING MYSELF JUST WATCH HIS STUFF#im watching other shows too . im gonna watch all of the ultramen. not just zero#gaia is really good so far and i really liked geed and taking a break to see some ridiculous 60s ultraman is fun#i just love zero. bc he really is the favorite. he got to control the flow of time once. why can he do that. why was he allowed to do that#zero is the ultraman series' special little princess. i respect it so hard. keep putting him in shows that arent even his#imagine getting introduced in a MOVIE SPECIAL and everyone loving you so much you get 20 more stories written abt you
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THE WAY YOU WRITE IS JUST SO YUMMM so yeah🧍🏻♀️can you write something about streamer ellie <33
☆: IM SO SORRY FOR THE WAIT. definitelyyyy hasn't been...months...anyway. positive this is one of the worse things i've written, but didn't wanna leave you hanging forever! ngl it's pretty filthy..heh.
◇: 18+ pretend those twitch guideline things don't exist. remote control vibrator use, orgasm denial, sub-ish!ellie?? plot twist at the end bc i think im so funny. 1.6k wc. don't mind the layout of this idk what else to do...
You watch your girlfriend stream her game from your fluffy and comfortable spot on your shared bed—you observe how focused she was on her screen, how her skilled fingers were flying across the keyboard and mouse. It would certainly be a shame to disturb her in such a high tension moment but you think it over, running your finger over the small buttons of the sleek little remote in your hand.
"Yeah, yeah, got 'em! Look at that guys, I fuckin’ aced that!" Ellie rejoices in her victory, and gleefully boasts to her viewers, adjusting her microphone closer and leaning back in her chair.
You're glad you were far off camera, her fans didn't even know she was in a relationship—Ellie made it clear she wanted you to be separate from her hobbies, not because she wanted to keep you a secret, but because she wanted to keep you safe. And you enjoyed watching her stream from the sidelines like this, you saw how her personality captivated viewers and how much fun she really was. But you also enjoyed messing with her on the occasion. Like today.
"Can I watch tonight's stream again?" You asked her eagerly. "Yeah, why not? I'll be doing some tournaments and stuff though, so no distractions." Oops. You bit back a laugh. Ellie immediately sussed out the mischievous look on your face and she sighed, expecting the worst.
Then you showed her the box you've been hiding, "Please let's try, I won't click it too much, I promise." She stared at you for a whole minute, maybe more, before sighing and reluctantly agreeing, rubbing her hands all over her face. "God, fine. Just 'cause I love you. Damn you're evil."
Fast forward to now—the device was snugly inserted inside her pretty pussy, tested out to prove it does in fact work, and works well at that.
So off Ellie went to play her game, getting so caught up in everything she seemingly forgot about the device entirely. In between games she was talking to the viewers, reading the chat and joking back and forth. You decided it was a good enough time to click it so you pressed the button, only for a miniscule zap.
She jerked in her seat, gasping, but quickly recovered with a strategic cough. "Phew sorry guys, something got caught in my throat." You saw a bright berry blush spread across her face, and the way she fought to turn and throw a glare at you. This was going to be fun.
"Alright, the next round’s gonna start, we gotta lock in! Hopefully nothing pops up and this goes smoothly. I can taste the win already.” She put a certain warning tone to her voice in the last part of her sentence, you knew it was meant for you, but were you going to listen? Absolutely not. "Oh yeah chat fun fact, this old area of the map was inspired by ancient ruins just of—ah!" As if her body had a mind of its own, she squirmed in her seat and she clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle a moan when you hit it again, but this time you didn't turn it off right away. You kept it going for a few more seconds, to prolong the terribly delicious sensation.
She screwed her eyes shut tightly and held her breath until you turned it off, mumbling to her viewers about "having hiccups". "The game is starting now, so we really gotta get serious." Her voice had an unsteadiness to it only you could hear, she was keeping her composure rather well so far. But likely wouldn't be able to keep up the act for much longer. Even she has her limits.
As her match went on, she got quiet when she was focused, mashing the keys with a speed fast as sound. Of course, you hit it again, just a short one, causing a choked "guh" to escape from her lips and she twitched when you did so, her facade starting to crack. The effort to keep her voice stable was showing, she was huffing and struggling to get her words out clearly, they were laced with obvious irritation.
"Fuck missed the shot, dammit. Yeah I don't know, somethings up today, sorry guys...off my game." You decided to be nice to her until the game ended, not pressing it further or adjusting the intensity. She played for a little while longer before losing the match, leaning forward on the desk with her face in her hands. This was the perfect moment, so you cranked it up, increased the intensity to maximum, and held the button for the longest time yet, making her whine—a low, drawn out sound she couldn't stifle this time.
You could hear lots of messages being sent, pings in rapid succession, they were probably clipping that moment. Perverts, you thought.
Her chest was noticeably heaving up and down, her legs spread as she rocks her front against the chair, and she kept her head lowered until you decreased the intensity but didn't turn it all the way off. Her hands were shaking, and her face was a vibrant cherry red, the screen even reflected the sparkle of a couple tears in her eyes.
“What? Oh, I'm just so sad about the loss guys, we were so close—hnn- so…so closeahh—I mean, we should've gotten that…” She trailed off, chewing on her bottom lip and tapping her fingers on the desk’s wooden surface. “Y’know what, I'll be right back.” She paused the stream, made triple sure her camera and microphone were turned off, then whipped around in her chair to face you, glaring silver daggers your way.
You just giggled innocently and turned the device off again. “What the fuck is wrong with you, this shit is not- not light on you at all.” Her voice was breaking, her pretty features contorted in a beautifully needy expression, eyebrows furrowed and eyes all watery. Nearly as wet as the mess in her pants. You feigned innocence and shrugged at her, “Well I didn't know it was that strong.” “You knew damn well.” She's fed up with your antics, but you have fun playing with her. She covers her face and leans back in the chair, the embarrassment in her voice the only thing you could hear, “Fuck you...turn it up again, wanna cum.”
You couldn't contain the laugh that burst forth from your chest, then said, “Only if you stream it.” The shock that flickered across her face was priceless, you wish you could have snapped a photo.
“What the fuck do you mean by that, nah forget it.”
“Hey, you gotta finish your stream either way, they're waiting. Would you wanna be so awful and deprive those darlings of your presence?”
You flash her a sugary smile, and she shoots you a murderous look again, before wordlessly scooting back to her setup, fanning herself briefly and readjusting her coppery hair.
Then she turns the stream back on. “Sorry guys, I had to get up for a second. Anyway, let's play one more game. I'm getting kinda tired today. Let's make this one count, lock in like never before.” She takes a deep breath, cracks her knuckles, and begins smacking away at the keyboard buttons. You're able to see the way she looks tense, on edge, anticipating your devilish interruption.
You debate whether you should torture her, but the answer quickly becomes clear. Click.
“Ah—fuck!” She sputters, and roughly slams her fist on the desk. The pleasure was hitting her with full force, she was in her own, lewd, world now. Her head is thrown back, back arched and hips stuttering, the release was about to sneak up on her.
You watch the scenario unfold, licking your lips and pressing your thighs together to deal with the pressure between them. Her unapologetic moans get louder, but for a second she snaps out of the trance to sit back upright, turn the stream off, before the peak hits her like a truck.
“Holy, fu—hah!!” With a squeal she cums, not caring about how fucking loud she was being, wanting to be selfishly absorbed in ecstasy.
She started to jolt around in her seat, the throes of overstimulation making her whimper like an animal in heat, it truly was a sight to behold. You wish you were in between her legs, lapping up her sweetness straight from the source, but in a way, just watching from the sidelines was satisfying enough. You'll clean her up afterward.
Finally you turned it off once and for all, and gazed at her, she was panting heavily, the post-orgasm glow making her rosy skin shimmer in the low light.
“Hmmm, thanks babe, that was so good…” She tried to talk, her head was in the clouds, but she looked at peace.
“You're a whore.” You chortled, and you two shared a laugh.
Although, a flurry of shrill sounds brought you both out of the fantasy. Ping, ping, ping.
Unfortunately she wasn't able to enjoy the aftermath of a mind-numbing session, because her eyes shot open and she began scrambling to find the source of the sound. Your stomach dropped as you watched her panic, her neuroticism infectious.
She looked at you, her eyes wider than saucers, nothing but fear in her voice, “I wasn't able to turn my mic off…”
What was she going to do now?
if you'd like to be tagged in my fics, click here! thank you for reading. asks, reblogs, and comments are appreciated more than you know. ♡
tags: @andersonfilms @ch6douin @aouiaa @sapphic-ovaries @astro-cat2 @paqerings @r3starttt @littlefallenangel111 @sinfulprayerss @lvlymicha @sunnsh1ine @anniee333 @pinkcwake @marsworlddd @caszzine @saturnsdrafts @ashaynep @mascdom @xysbree @liddysflyer @fortune777 @brunaedn @bunnitewsilly @mimasroom2 @deliriousrn @infiniteinquiries @thekill3randthefinalgirl @kissyslut @elliesapple
#ellie williams#ellie williams x reader#ellie x reader#ellie tlou#the last of us 2#lesbian#tlou#ellie the last of us 2#ellie#ellie the last of us#ellie x fem reader#ellie williams tlou#ellie williams smut#ellie smut#sub!ellie#gamer!ellie#tlou smut#the last of us part 2#the last of us smut#the last of us#ellie williams imagine#ellie williams drabble#ellie williams concept#ellie williams the last of us#ellie x you#ellie x y/n#ellie williams x reader smut#ellie williams x you#𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬.#𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬.
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thinking about the last episode of the breaking bad on this fine sunday morning
#river.txt#god that was#such a phenomenal show#i've watched (and played. games count too) a handful of things in my life right and i loved many of them#but few make me feel like this when i'm done with them?#that i just sit here for weeks or months like. damn. that was. something else.#i think so far on that list we only have hannibal da2 tlou2 and breaking bad (and i hope im not forgetting smthin lol)#idk those 4 are just in this specific category that i cant even describe#like. watching this story unfold and then u arrive at the end and it ends and u are just. empty?#no thoughts head empty need to sleep it off for the next 4 days#idk in a small way they maybe make u feel like. they took something from u when they ended#maybe because there is no real.. happy ending? or the ending is somewhat anticlimactic?#but in a good way#like. shitty things happen throughout the entire story and they just keep getting worse#and of course u have no illusions about a happy ending. this is the kind of story that cannot end in a satisfying way#it just. ends.#i dont know#like. idk. there are many other stories i loved of course#and dishonored feels like it could fit here but. despite it being so grim the entire time u find emily in the end#like there IS light at the end#i loved the merlin show too and despite it being extremely sad in the last few episodes it just#doesnt have that same feeling because the rest of the show is light-hearted up until then#and then even in the end despite how sad it is i dont feel empty after finishing it because its good and right how it ended#and love is there and its not all grim and bad#maybe poe could slightly fit into the hannibal+etc category because in your own personal quest and your companions' quests#in the end they are all more or less for nothing because u dont get the ending u wanted u dont get what u sought#but despite that u get a sense of peace when the game is finished#maybe poe2 has more of that vibe because while its not super grim and dark u spent the entire game chasing something#only for things to happen anyway because u have no say in it no control over it and u cant do anything#i guess thats the thing about the category im trying to describe
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rating different ways that characters are generally revealed to be jewish in tv and movies made by (mostly) goyim:
B'nei mitzvah mention: 3/10, points taken off for laziness. kept some because it's an important event so I get why it's used
B'nei mitzvah scene: 8/10, can either be really good or really bad depending how accurate. honestly ranges from a 5/10-11/10
Chanukkah mention: 0/10, im so tired of this one its so overdone and it's always in the christmas specials. it can be done right but like that's only if jews are writing the scene
Pesach mention: 4/10, definitely a better holiday to use than chanukah because it's not done to death and it isn't automatically paired with christmas. points removed for the inevitable inaccuracies
Rosh Hashanah mention: 7.5/10 just for using a holiday that most people wouldn't think of or may not even know of
Literally any other jewish holiday: 9/10 how do you know about this who told you
Any jewish holiday scene: 7.5/10, which actually means it can range from 5-10 depending on how ridiculous and wrong the scene is making my rating perfectly average.
shabbat mention: 8/10, kinda love it. it's also really good for casual conversations because its a weekly occurrence so there's plenty of ways for it to feel natural when bringing it up in a script
shabbat dinner scene: 15/10 absolutely love it especially bc it shows character dynamics in a casual setting. if there's anything incorrect it doesn't bother me much because the ways people observe shabbat vary a lot
"im jewish": 10/10 straight to the point no notes love it
literally any mention of money/greed/power: -10/10 shut up shut up shut up why is your only jewish character rich and greedy and why is that their defining trait
antisemitic comments: -15/10 why can't you think of anything nice to say.
nose comments: -100/10 needs to be in a separate category because I hate it so much. somehow even worse when its a goyische actor wearing a prosthesis and caked on "jewish" makeup bc like how are you being fake racist rn
not even saying anything and just making it painfully obvious: 8/10, yeah that character's last name is goldberg so it's pretty clear and I like that. I do wish it was mentioned upfront though
brit milah mention: 5/10, its usually played for laughs which feels a bit weird but not weird enough for me to care. this is a true neutral
having them wear a kippah/magen david/anything visibly jewish from the second theyre introduced: 100/10 my favorite by far because it's made clear from the start and there's no question about it
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spencer one shot where he’s angry at somebody else [bc he so does look so kissable when he’s angry >:(] maybe someone at one of the precincts they’re working at said something rude about r and he defends u and maybe he gets a lil kiss <3
im thinking “this is calm and it’s doctor” vibes bc that scene does things to me 😭
ty for requesting ♡ fem, 1.1k
cw for sexual harassment
"Jesus," Spencer says, rushing to stand behind you as you bend over.
"Mm?" you hum. You're fishing for your dropped change unsuccessfully by the precinct vending machines. "They have your chips, did you see?"
"Your pants are ripped," Spencer says, hand ghosting your thigh.
"What?" you ask, shooting up. You turn on the spot to hide, hand leaping back. You feel at the seam. "Where?"
"Top of your thigh."
"Shit, really? Can you see my–"
"Yeah," he says, meeting your wide eyes while you locate the rip. "How did you do that?" He laughs.
"Don't laugh!" you demand, though you're giggling as you do, hand covering your thigh and the bottom of your butt inefficiently.
"Do you want my jacket?"
"Don't cover it up, toots."
You and Spencer both blink. There's a crowd of grinning beat cops by the door of the cafeteria who've obviously witnessed your misdemeanour. "Toots?" Spencer asks.
"Sorry, boys, that's the end of the show," you say with a grin. Not because you particularly enjoy having been oggled, but it's always been like this. Men will always make weird comments to you, and you've learned to play nice until they're out of your jurisdiction.
"Turn back around," one says bravely, though you aren't sure which one.
Spencer stands in front of you subtly. "Do you know that thirty eight percent of women experience sexual harassment in the workplace?" he asks, quick but measured. "Thirty eight percent, but I'm sure a much smaller number of those women are federal agents, and a smaller number again have the capacity to break your arm. I've seen her give serial killers radial fractures. I've seen her do worse."
"We were just messing around," one says.
"No need to get defensive," says another. "Don't get mad, boy."
"I am defensive, but I'm not mad."
His tone attracts the attention of a precinct sergeant who barks at them to stop messing around and get back to work. "Were they bothering you?" he asks after they've filtered out with their heads down.
"No," you say swiftly. "Everything's fine."
Spencer frowns, worse when the sergeant leaves, turning to you to take your hand. A few weeks ago at a company picnic, when the sun was high and your spirits comparatively lower, you'd apologised to him for flirting. You love to flirt and especially with him, puppy eyed Spencer with his head of brown hair and his big brain, but some of the team suggested you were taking it too far. You apologised, but Spencer didn't really get what you were saying sorry for and took your hand to lead you out of the sun. He protects you.
"You okay?" he asks.
"I'm fine."
"You sure?" His voice fries.
"I'm sure," you say. His hand is an interesting thing on yours. He has long, long fingers that seem to possess their own willpower, moving even as they're sewn through yours. "I don't know what to do about my pants."
Spencer's eyebrows pinch together. "Well, I'll take care of that. I'll find you something. I can't believe those as–"
"Oh," you interrupt, taking your hand back in want of a better thing to hold, his cheek a mix of soft and scratchy against your palm. "You're still mad."
"I'm not mad," he insists, though eventually he relents, "Alright, I'm angry that they'd think it was okay to objectify you."
"What else?" you ask, letting your voice drop in pitch, the sound smooth as angora silk.
"I'm thinking about if I hadn't been here."
"I can protect myself," you murmur, endeared by the heat in his gaze. "You said it yourself, handsome. Radial fractures."
"You shouldn't have to."
"We both already know that," you say, the side of your hand slipping down his cheek reverently. He squints gently, his lashes dark triangles, his irises a browned sugar. His jaw clenches under your touch. "You're handsome."
"Right now?" he asks dryly.
"Are you handsome right now?"
"Are you really flirting with me right now?"
"Why wouldn't I be?" You draw a line under his ear whisper soft to curl a longer strand of his hair around the tip. "You look hot when you're winning."
"What did I win?" he asks, like he doesn't want to know.
You grin at him, stickying. "Would you like an itemised list?" you ask, rising on tiptoes to speak into the shell of his ear. "What do you think you deserve, handsome? For such a fearless defence?"
He's not immune to your whims, but he is used to them, planting his hands on your shoulders to ease you back on sure footing. "I don't want anything. I'll always defend you."
"Can I give you a small token of my gratitude, at least?"
His pinking cheeks practically emanate heat. "We don't have time for this," he says regretfully, "I still have to find you a coverup."
"Just a small token," you say.
He hums and haws. "Alright. Okay, whatever you want."
"You sure?"
He nods once, his jaw working with something unsaid. You touch his neck, fingertips trailing along the underside of his jaw until you're sure it's what he wants before you brace your hands behind his head and press a chaste kiss to his cheek, close enough that the corner of his lips align with yours but don't overlap. His neck is hot in your hands, his hair soft, his breath hooking as you lift your lips just a touch and your nose digs into his cheek. "Thank you, Spencer," you whisper.
He pulls you closer.
You shudder as his hand presses into the small of your back, wondering what it is he wants to do. His fingers spread. Your thoughts turn to white noise. Like he can sense it, he breathes out and steps away, but any sense of urgency is gone.
"As much as I might tease, I really do need some pants," you say. "I'm not very interested in anyone else seeing my panties today."
He rushes off to find you something and you press the backs of your fingers to your cheeks, feeling the heat there with a resigned embarrassment. He has no idea how much power he has over you, in his stony anger and his eager reception. The phantom of his hand warms your back until he returns, his sweater in hand. "Sorry, this is it."
"If you want me to wear your clothes, just say so."
"Hotch is pretty pissed at us."
"Ah," you sigh, tying his sweater around your waist, "another day in paradise, baby."
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid oneshot#spencer reid scenario#spencer reid drabble#spencer reid fic#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds#criminal minds fic#criminal minds x reader
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